Honeymoon?

The honeymoon is known as the brief, but harmonious period at the beginning of a relationship. Common examples include real boy/girl relationships, video games, and M. Night Shamalyanla movies (it should be noted that the period ends right after the opening trailers). It also applies to jobs.

I remember when I had a job making sno cones. It was awesome! Talk to pretty underage girls (I was underage, too, so it was legit), and all the sno cones you can eat! It only took a short while to discover that I was sticky, got paid $5.25 ( $0.10 more than minimum, however), and only served old ladies while having a stomach ache (to much wedding cake).

Honeymoons are good and bad. The beginning and middle are great, but the end sucks. You could say I'm honeymooning my new job because I love it, or it could just be this company has its shit together.

The past couple days I've been meeting people at the corporate office and engineering and development center (E&DC), and sitting down with the most important people like my benefits advisor, CEO, HR manager, IT staff, and my boss. They call this "onboarding". Basically, it's a system of getting you ramped up and ready to wreck people's shit.

Trust me, it works. They are literally going off a checklist to make sure everything is taken care of for me. Things like making sure I'm going to get my check to helping me setup the printer on my laptop. Seriously, my boss made sure I had my printer setup. Yeah, an easy task, but he personally took time out of his day to make sure my test page came out. Mind. Blown.

I don't mind having my hand held because I now accept the fact that I don't have to guess how to do things, or how things are run. I know from day one that my computer will print.

My list is almost like a quest. I'm going around to different people, talking to them about whatever topic, and checking it off. So far I'm now educated in the company intranet, how to submit expense reports, and what I need to include on my weekly report. No guesswork whatsoever. 

In addition to that, I've hopped on whatever projects my boss is doing. He is letting me tag along and see exactly what he does on projects. I couldn't ask for more.

This experience has left me with a much better impression of the company, where I belong in the whole system, and how they view me as an engineer and a professional. My old co-op was like "meh, go find something to do", and I thought that was the best (honeymoon anyone?).

The only downside I've found is since I've been traveling is I'm working almost around the clock. My day starts at 6:30 (5:30 tomorrow) and end at 1 or 2 (whenever I go to bed). It may sound crazy, but most of my morning was eating breakfast hanging out, then meeting with my boss, followed by relaxing at Gate 38C and then sleeping on an airplane for 2 hrs. Not a whole lot of "work", but I'm not sitting around watching TV either.

When it was time to work, we walked around a plant we are closing for an hour or so, and then went to Joe's Crab Shack to drink beer and eat. Punching a clock is so overrated.

I expected to work a little longer while traveling, but this is more standby to standby.

Tomorrow I'm told, will be different story. My boss and I are going to be dubbed "rigging and demolition" so I'll be doing something fun and dirty.

Time 4 nappa. I have snacka tomorrow early with the work crew.

Why Don't People Do Their Jobs?

Everyone has dream jobs when they are little. I wanted to be a monster truck driver. I was inspired after playing Microsoft's Monster Truck Madness. The help file even had a part dedicated to everything about monster trucks and what a driver needs in order to become one. I was hooked.

Then I decided that I should be an engineer instead.

Even though engineering is awesome, I think I missed the point. The true goal of a successful career is not to enjoy what you do and make money, it is to do as least as possible and make money.

Based on my personal experiences, I now present to you a list of the best career choices.

1) Banker

All you do is run a cash register. The best part? THE HOURS!! Those poor saps working 8 to 5 are missing the best things in life, like time with your kids after school. Bankers enjoy hours from 9 to 4:30, no weekends and no holidays [Regions]. Don't tell me they "show up early" to get started. What do they have to do? Unlock the vault? Best jobs have the best hours.

2) Professional Baseball Player

This was recommended to me by a friend. It makes complete sense. Anyone who watches baseball (better know as "try to beat the Yankees this year") knows it sucks. The people playing know it's boring, too! Unless you're the pitcher, life is a cake walk. You can make a metric ass ton of money just by standing around and holding your glove out when a ball comes your way. Unless you have real skill (or juice), you probably won't be hitting home runs all the time. So you'll probably just make on average $1.1M if you play on the Houston Astros (who?), or an average of $5.5M if you play on the Yankees [USA Today]. Easy choice.

3) Real Estate

This one is my personal favorite. Basically, you sell houses. Houses are expensive and the market is slow, however, we are comparing the ratio of actual work done to actual money received. In my limited experience with real estate, I know one thing, people who have houses for sale are impossible to get a hold of. I called 10 properties to look at. I only looked at 4 on the list, and turned down only 1. That leaves 5 properties that could have been sold, but no one called me back. WTF? How can they run a business when they don't do anything? It's amazing! Maybe the infomercials are true.

It all started when I was curious about my soon to be Thomas Estate. The property manager (RE/MAX Lazy Ass) was impossible to get a hold of to ask any kind of question about the property. After pulling a few teeth, I was told to submit an application. They couldn't even accept my overpriced application fee. After I filled it out online, I was directed to a pay site (kinda like PayPal), but that didn't work. I called the number to pay online (same PayPal like people) and they said they don't accept payment for them anymore. I call the RE/MAX office, and no one is there. It was 10am. WTF?

My agent is now wondering wtf is going on and why it is taking so long. If you are in the business to sell properties, why don't you sell them? How do you make money?

So here I am, really wanting this beautiful house, but the managing company reminds me of Twenty-One antics.

Being a grown-up sucks.

In other news, I finally got my dune buggy, Orange Slice, running today. I left her alone far to long in 21's parking lot. After new coil, plugs, wires, points, condenser, battery, new fuel, and halfway cleaning the carb, I got her halfway running. I couldn't get it to idle right without the choke on, so I jerry rigged the choke just like the previous carb was and took it around the property about 30 times. It was fantastic. The neighbors endured over and hour of loud, unrestricted, German pancake 4 banger air cooled engineering. 

Being a grown-up rocks.

House Hunt Final Day

The last day I spent in Atlanta was fantastic. I went to a yuppie place for breakfast and got started with my salesman after I check out of my hotel.

We went straight to the neighborhood we scoped yesterday because he had 2 more houses for me to look at. He also called up other agents again when he saw a sign.

I opted to look at one I liked yesterday with hardwood floors (henceforth known as "Hardwood Floors") and fell in love with it all over again. I was really looking forward to moving in that place.

The next was a house that just came on the market. It was a tad rough on the inside, but it would be completely redone. The best part about it was the elevated back deck and the daylight basement. My dealer said it would be great for parties since spilled drinks on the slab wouldn't matter (: He did say it wouldn't be as nice as Hardwood Floors so the party house became a backup.

The third was a dry call. It was pretty cool inside, but just not as nice as Hardwood Floors.

After checking out all the houses, I made my choice: Hardwood Floors with luxurious cabinets, sweet carpet upstairs, and enormous bedrooms. We got the paperwork started, and I was on my way home.

Now I just have to sit tight while everything is worked out (:

House Hunt Day 2

Much better day.

First I checked out a little place in Marietta, GA. It was little indeed, so that was an easy pass.

Then I was off to check out another place in Douglasville with an actual real estate salesman, but it was run down and beat up. Probably since the place was built in the 70s. It had a finished basement, but it was still dingy.

Then he took me to another place since he seemed embarrassed about showing me the That 70s Show house 40 years later. This second house will henceforth be known as "The Mansion".

It is a crazy huge, split level house with a massive living room, massive dining room, massive kitchen, massive breakfast nook, massive bedrooms, and massive master bedroom. It was built in the 80s, but everything is new from the paint to carpet to counters. It was in superb shape, even by my standards (so glad I helped Dad fix up the house growing up). The only downside is it is 45 min (without traffic) to the airport. FML.

However, with a trusty tipoff to a great Coldwell Banker real estate salesman, I began my afternoon being chauffeured around southwestern Atlanta checking out properties. Even properties he didn't initially bring he was able to spot from the street and just bust in and let me view them.

All of the ones I saw were amazing. One is close to both the airport and my office, and has a great big living room.

Another was VERY close to my office (2 mi), but it was pretty rough inside. The tub had a hole in it. WTF...

The next 3 are all in the same suburb.

The first has a decent setup downstairs and large rooms with luxurious carpet upstairs, and located right next to the airport and still close to the office.

The second is an ENORMOUS floor plan (2500 sqft!!) complete with a living room, another living room, dining room, breakfast area/another dining room, and another living room/den upstairs. Wasn't able to get a price, but it may be over my limit.

The third is one I haven't looked at yet. I believe it is comparable to the first one, but I'll see tomorrow!

All in all, today was loads better than yesterday. I will never again go online to find places. I'm going to call a real estate co and let them do all the legwork for me. The best part is the guy wasn't even pushing sales. If a house sucked he agreed with me.

Tomorrow I'm going to meet up with my dealer again to check out the last house and possibly take a second look at one or two again to make sure I'm game. Then it's off to talk paperwork (:

House Hunt Day 1

I've learned a lot today.

Firstly, I-285 is INSANE to drive on. From the moment you shoot on and acquire cruising speed (55mph posted) you realize that you will cause an accident. The only way to survive is to accelerate to attack speed (80-85mph) so you don't become roadkill. I was literally zipping on the loop at 75 and getting passed like I was going the other direction. Once I hit 85 people were still passing me, but I didn't want to go any faster. Everyone else had Audi's and BMW's and I was scared my poor Civic couldn't handle this American Autobahn. City driving is the same, posted speed is 35mph but everyone goes 55. Sure makes quick work getting around!

After my extreme driving experience,I had the chance to look at two places today. Both had the lock box with a key so I could let myself in without hearing the sales pitch of a realtor. Little did I know that this equates to  shithole properties.

One was on the south end of town in Riverdale (we shall refer to this as Acceptable Shithole), and the other was located west in Douglasville (henceforth known as OMGWTFBBQ Shithole).

Acceptable Shithole was nice. Large living room, large kitchen, big dining room, and nice sized bedrooms went well on this 2 story dwelling. Even the garage was huge (: That was the "acceptable" part. The "shithole" part is the cabinets. After opening them to check for mold (huge problem at 21) I was greeting by mold growing on mold, literally. It was a Mold Castle. Other drawers were scratched up like a puma was trapped in them. The place was also a bit dirty with smudges on the walls. Nothing that a cleaning crew couldn't handle. I would give this place a B if they could manage to redo the cabinets and clean up a bit.

Then comes this beauty, OMGWTFBBQ Shithole. The different in the listing pics and what I saw today is like going from Taylor Swift to Amy Winehouse. To start, I walk upstairs and there is crap all over the kitchen. The cabinets are surprisingly redone, so there isn't any mold or heavy damage. However, there was food and booze in the fridge. The floor was filthy. One bedroom had marker ink all over the carpet, crayon on the wall, the door was nearly in 2 pieces, and toys everywhere. The master had a tv and a knocked over lamp. The backyard had a plastic tub with more toys and a small dog pen (no dog).

Now as I'm going about this house, I'm afraid I'm going to stumble upon either a meth head, a meth head cooking meth, or a dead body. This in mind, I make my way to the daylight basement. As I descend the stairs, I'm greeting with 3 doors. I pick one and I am greeted by the massive 2 car garage (yay!). However, there is a studded wall (no drywall/insulation) that divides the garage into a 2 other rooms (remember the doors?). Inside these "rooms" was a ton of clothes, toys, and insulation. It was like the drop off at a Goodwill.

I honestly could not believe that someone would pawn this off as a rental. It was atrocious. No wonder the rental agency doesn't want to be there with you.

So to make things better, I talked with a REAL realtor from Coldwell Banker. She gave me a list of sweet places that I haven't seen online. Two of the places are literally 6 min away from my office. I could literally walk to work (30 min by foot). They are a tad more expensive, but if they look like actual houses that someone would live in I think they will be worth it.

I hope tomorrow is more promising than today was. Bleh...

2 Weeks Left

I'm getting closer to my start date. I tried to put in a 2 week notice on my sleeping in habits, but that failed. I still roll out of bed around 1pm. Maybe I should enjoy it while I can (:

I did awake to a surprise from FedEx in the form of a box from Consolidated Container. It was a little "welcome kit" with a T-shirt, hat, coffee mug, backpack, pens, notepad, etc. I was stoked! I love free corporate stuff. I feel so loved :D

I'm also getting closer to arranging my trip to ATL to scope houses. I'm going to setup some appointments tomorrow and make the trip later this week. My adoptive parents should be joining me so I can get a second opinion.

I've also started Week 5 of P90X. These workouts keep getting crazier. Who the hell does 1 arm push ups as a workout?

End Game

My search is complete. I have been offered and accepted a position as Utilities Engineer for Consolidated Container Company. I was able to walk away from the negotiating table with a decent salary, significant relocation bonus, vacation time ready to go, and a pro-rated end of year bonus (should it be dispersed). Not a bad deal if you ask me.

All that's left now is to find a spot in luxurious Atlanta and enjoy my own place. My first work assignment will start Sep 27th where I'll be traveling for 2 weeks doing engineering stuff. This will be followed by a "long weekend" (boss' words) where I'll actually drive a U-Haul with all my crap to the city.

I get the feeling everyone at CCC is just as excited as I am to come aboard. I'm super excited because suddenly all my problems (read: money problems) will suddenly evaporate as I have a bank account with more than $200 in it at any given time (:

As far as the Navy goes, that will be on hold indefinitely. I'm not going to stop P90X, but I'm not going to be racking my brain trying to prepare for the tedious technical interviews either. If I should find that in a couple years making plastic bottles isn't my thing, then I'll explore the naval avenue if needed.

I'll still post updates here, but the main focus will shift from me searching for a job and go towards how I make the transition into the professional life.

I invite you to join me for the ride (:

It's Now or Nothin'

Earlier this week, I was able to make my way over to Atlanta to check out the milk bottle making business. I was impressed with what I saw. I don't think I'll be able to look at a gallon of cow juice the same again.

Most of my time was spent with my future boss should everything go right. I also spent some time with the other engineering managers just talking. Not to much official interview banter. Just open conversation. I'm starting to think behavioral questions are like field sobriety tests - totally unnecessary.

My host had a lot of good information to offer. It seems that they have been talking about me a lot. He even had a 90 day outline of what I would be doing should I get on. Hells yeah!!

I expected to hear something from the corporate recruiting department in "7 to 10 days". However, they called me this morning! I was gone less than 24 hrs! I talked with the rep and she asked how my interview went and things like that. That's when she told me that they wanted to "move forward" with me. How much more forward can I go?!

It turns out they want some references and wanted to get my side of the story of how much I expect to earn.

The most interesting thing about my conversations with corporate recruiting and my host was they both probed me for info about other companies I was currently looking at. With the Navy being the only other one on the list, I divulged a little info. I couldn't really scoot around this topic since I met the VP on the plane ride back from a sub (:

I just told them things I like about the Navy, and things I like about the available position. In my opinion, the main drawback of the Navy is not knowing where I'll be living. I want to stay in the southeast. No snow and close to college football that matters.

Now it's time to wait and see if she calls me back with more good news/hoops to jump through!